This just in from ESPN:
"As reported in this week's issue of ESPN the Ragazine, prosecutors are now asking for Scott Peterson to be freed and cleared of all charges. ESPN has learned from reputable sources that Jim Tressel and Andy Geiger will be charged in the killing of Laci Peterson and her unborn child.
It is believed that these unidentified sources include former football players, who couldn't handle their own class scheduling, were arrested on drug and weapons charges, became academically ineligible, and were suspended for being untruthful with NCAA incestigators.
But in an attempt to be 'fair and balanced', ESPN is reporting these charges, so that viewers and readers can decide for themselves.
ESPN has also learned that Tressel and Geiger were involved in arranging hookers for recruits at the University of Colorado. This was in an attempt to discredit Colorado's football program, due to the intense recruiting battles between the 2 football programs.
ESPN had decided that this story is also credible, since sophomore safety Dominique Brooks did show interest in both schools 2 years ago while in high school in Texas.
ESPN is issuing a complete apology to coach Gary Barnett and the University of Colorado regarding their 'fair and balanced' coverage of the Colorado recruiting scandal earlier this year. "At last the true culprits have been located," said an ESPN spokesperson.
ESPN is still investigating any connections that Tressel and Geiger might have to the airplanes that attacked the World Trade Center and the Pentagon on 9/11/2001; as well as possible involvement with alien abductions, Bigfoot, the Loch Ness monster, the crash of the Hindenburg, the Lindbergh baby kidnapping, and the disappearance of Amelia Earhart. The network is aware that these last 3 events occurred in the 1930's, before either man was born, but will leave no stone unturned in trying to allow the public to decide the truth in these matters.
"As reported in this week's issue of ESPN the Ragazine, prosecutors are now asking for Scott Peterson to be freed and cleared of all charges. ESPN has learned from reputable sources that Jim Tressel and Andy Geiger will be charged in the killing of Laci Peterson and her unborn child.
It is believed that these unidentified sources include former football players, who couldn't handle their own class scheduling, were arrested on drug and weapons charges, became academically ineligible, and were suspended for being untruthful with NCAA incestigators.
But in an attempt to be 'fair and balanced', ESPN is reporting these charges, so that viewers and readers can decide for themselves.
ESPN has also learned that Tressel and Geiger were involved in arranging hookers for recruits at the University of Colorado. This was in an attempt to discredit Colorado's football program, due to the intense recruiting battles between the 2 football programs.
ESPN had decided that this story is also credible, since sophomore safety Dominique Brooks did show interest in both schools 2 years ago while in high school in Texas.
ESPN is issuing a complete apology to coach Gary Barnett and the University of Colorado regarding their 'fair and balanced' coverage of the Colorado recruiting scandal earlier this year. "At last the true culprits have been located," said an ESPN spokesperson.
ESPN is still investigating any connections that Tressel and Geiger might have to the airplanes that attacked the World Trade Center and the Pentagon on 9/11/2001; as well as possible involvement with alien abductions, Bigfoot, the Loch Ness monster, the crash of the Hindenburg, the Lindbergh baby kidnapping, and the disappearance of Amelia Earhart. The network is aware that these last 3 events occurred in the 1930's, before either man was born, but will leave no stone unturned in trying to allow the public to decide the truth in these matters.
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